Category: Community Poem Archive

Community Poem April 2025

I’m in love with Bradley Taylor!


May your microphone stand never be flacid!
Your favourite dinosaur is wrong
If I was a dog what kind would I be?
Unsettled, bloated but content-ish
Bee’s Be buzzing, rainbows be raining, ‘What a pain it is to be alive’
YAH thank fuck for aspirin 
Lemon, banana, egg yolk, sunflower sunshine, hay, butter, cornflakes
Match latte tastes like grass and I love grass
Wicked and glad
Which hole did all these yellow Tories (Lib Dem) crawl out of
Oh for fuck sake, was it right or left Nigel (Shouted)
My my my. Aren’t you a lovely recession indicator
Cut it with 100% endurance
John Titch the halfwit leaning
Who the fuck is Alan?
I love you 
O temptress, let me lay flowers at your feet
But cut your fucking toenails
Rock
Jesus walked on liquid butter
Fell like tears of a dying god
I’m starting to use the (gaeilge) word Ispint for sausages. 
Every word of Irish is a bullet back to the (Brits- crossed out) coloniser
Your skin on mine feels like…
Like smoke curling up from the hollow anus of a recently cremated badger
I really hoped I wouldn’t lose hope

Helen Sheppard Reads The Community Poem

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Community Poem March 2025

Each hand gestures to its own goblin

Well there it is…
Friends are friends for just a season-
Who the fuck is Alan?!
8000 days of pain, just you left,
whatever you do don’t anger the old Gods!!!
Lord drug my mind,
your salad won’t save you
I like words and CHOCOLATE!

Brexit worked so well,
I didn’t mean the previous line!
eeny meeny miney bollocks
Piss, liquid of life
It’s all a little to the left-
Urine, liquor of my soul,
each hand gestures to its own goblin
Birds’ nests from breakage
wee wee, source of my joy!

I want to dance naked under the disco ball
plush sofas, kush loafers, a quest for the best-
my parents voted me ‘Worlds best organ doner!’
They sent her in a Pringles can
with a couple dreamies love for the road
cinnamon cream cuts cinema kindly to taste,
soft laughing caking in sick time ‘cough’

I bought my car off vinted for €2.50,
one day I came home at lunch time and I heard a funny noise,
why do you keep talking about your hard wood floors
and why are socks so hard?
your mom.

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Community Poem February 2025

Now you listen here, biscuit boy!
Compassion is the basis of morality.
I am a reusable cup, please return me

Floating through the dimensionless afternoon
I need to sit down. Where do the fish go at suppertime?

He was the bargain bin otter at the sperm bank,
Then his mouth dropped open and a vole popped out. 
Who is Alan, what is he for? 

Wonderings through witchcraft and struggles to remain men.
Sunsets and moonshine and hobbled, Robbled shoes. 
I left my keys on the kitchen table…

Bazinga-zinga Bazinga-zeng 
Every middle name is a character in Thomas the Tank Engine
Patchwork pattern, puzzle quilted

Life is too short to wait 10 minutes for a gin + tonic
0110001100 When you wave at the computer, your soul waves back.
There is an aging tortoise using face cream?

A line behind a line behind a line behind a line, how many words make up a line, how many letters behind one another lined up together line a line of loves.
The vivacious cat and a suitably startled rat.

Who is Alan, what is he for? 

SOL Community Poem, January 2025

Catalytic Converter For Sale


Blackthorne is the Wrongbow, Thatchers rules!
One drink away from being an overly-ambitious power bottom
Yet in the tunnels of love, I will choo choo should
you need the shove.

A low January sun and everything is edged in light
head buzzing like a broken fridge
Unhand me at once you buffoon!
Somewhere a lemon is growing

I saw the cat with something
she said  paint me like one of you French girls
red-raw like the table cloths

Hand dryer eclipsing the words of the bards
mustn’t mute the muntering Munson
snog the mic so it picks you up.

Lurchers? They’re always plotting something
don’t be a hero, be a massive twat, Elon Musk salute
were I a brew crew crusty my dog upon a rope

I’d like to learn more languages
not eat your viral sandwiches.
If Welsh is the answer what is the question?
Does the Pope shit in the woods?

Mary Berry is crocheting a beanie in a sex dungeon.

Community Poem November 2024

Safeword

Harry and Kate went to masturbate,
loving the vibration of love,
a slow, slinky ooziness.
A sausage, a hole and Vinted.
Breathe in, said Kate, exhale the fire of living.
The bag was bulging.

We need to establish a safeword, said Harry
I’m thinking of a line, said Kate, but it’s not happening,
the only thing that comes to mind is a thousand fucking doves.
Harry suggested: I love Ian Beale…?
Chocolate coins? said Kate Time is a construct!
Dare you! Dare you! Double dare you?

The naughty little mouse nibbled my member, said Harry
Well, your compliment wasn’t good enough, said Kate,
asking to see my anus on Instagram is not a love poem.
An ode for a misplaced hip flask? said Harry.

I hate loving you, you love hating me, said Harry,
and the postage was paid in Northern Ireland.

Days are unequal in the struggles of the dead, said Kate
What is stopping ants from taking over the world? Democracy?

I hope this line is read out of context
like Leda, like Persephone, like women, women, women. 
On this pirate ship poetry pandemonium,
we’re all just twatting around in the glitter.

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Community Poem October 2024

Helen Sheppard
You’d think after 30 years I would have learnt how to sleep
When candles melt, the fuck does the wax go?
Seriously where does the wax go when the candle burns? Help!
So shall I fetch you
The dog Star
He always thought the dog was his friend
Ducks and penguins aren’t always friends.
The cat was not amused
Daddy told me I should have cleaned up after that donkey crapped all over my forehead!
Later in the car dad will insist it was ketchup and I will wonder if he thinks I’m stupid.
Is anger counterproductive?
I saw a photo of this ship moored down at King’s Street today, 40 years ago. I don’t want to move that slowly.
Bro it’s only two inches, chill
I wanna get railed
I have legs and I love them
But I don’t know if I like it
I have to build a relationship but not for sex, all for your best interests
I love you but I want my nipples back
I’m in a booby prison
Even moderation is good in moderation
Life is about balance: 50% Namaste. 50% Fuck off!
It’s all about the midfield
The death of words is not a tragedy.
I’m feeling stressed my bum is itchy
Should I stop trying to make my brother turn gay?
www.solpoetry.org.uk
The trees reabsorb their chlorophyll and make autumn fire
They sang this on Glee.
Don’t let the fiery leaves fall and quietly fade without truly noticing their artwork
To Dads and Nans and Friends in ships
Your bed becomes a crucible for my dreams
The ginger beer bubbles scratch my throat, it feels almost as good as an orgasm

Community Poem September 2024

The clitoris of a mature woman can be a word or compilation, the path chosen and choices she made determine what she wants to write.

Oh, fuck a duck
The lobster laughed.
I butchered my poem
And then it changed colour and fell off
and they never grow back properly

You outrageous bastards
I hope I’m not just an open micer to you guys,
but also a subject for your next confused wet dream
I wish I were a fairy
This too will pass


A hot water urn full of lukewarm piss. Disappointing on both counts
For someone who heard so little he deduced so much
Wait where is this all going?
Something stupid, something like… Turbo island glitter ball
Fill your guts with star shaped Hernia Discopline stick

Like a moth to a flame Eve was not the only one tempted
where there’s smoke there’s fire. And it all fades away
I despise the man, the father I envy. You had the life I wanted.
Train-wreck into the blue, never thought I’d be here without you
Does the middle brick in the tunnel know about the light?

Live, laugh, triangulate
barking dogs don’t bite
I dream of love. Now love dreams of me
I’m doing a good job reading this on stage.
I am brave. Give me applause please.

Community poem July 2024

Love is a poet’s omelette
hidden beneath trench coats
and full brim fedoras.

We’re going to get you
Out of here, all right?
I give myself to you

Nice to meet you… Again!
Are the voices louder to drown
Out the internal monologue

Enough of this silly posturing
I wanted it to be smoothed down…

I reversed my anger into the space
I’m tired of asking why It
stinks of oil here.

A pointless pen.
They used to use black slugs
As carriage wheel lube.

There is an eyelash somewhere
that carries a wish…
Unhand me, you oaf!

Old Books, new poems and J not I,
Weaving Kayaks, Mountains, trees
and histories into a fabric of words!

July’s poem should have
been called Helen High-water…

Community Poem June 2024

No Comments

If They Hadn’t Written This Would You Have?

(Shouted) Derek! They’ve stolen the geraniums again
that’s the biggest I’ve ever seen
You’ve snatched the world up of precious solitude which you have been craving for so long and realised it was in fact loneliness
A life of collaborative A Level anxiety


Isn’t it rude to leave at the interval after you’ve read every fucking time
leaving behind nothing but the faint whiff of an old fart?
Liberation for Palestine is liberation for us all. Ask yourself what you are doing at this moment
If I hadn’t written this would have you?
I spent the day horizontal in the park


Please improvise this line and don’t just read out this
To be cringe is to be free, apart from if you’re me right now in this exact situation
There is nothing so bloody wonderful as genuine warmth and encouragement, and there is so much love here
Rim Tim Tag I dim
But to see you again would destroy the memory
Marz

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Community Poem May 2024

Stick it in the fuck it bucket

We’re 8 people sat on a boat,
human connection is rare and very needed today, I received it
here.
Alarmingly dysfunctional,
I can only just hold conversations with people that are as
socially inept as I am.
Henry sucky so good,
I’m a psychoactive toad baby, lick me all over and see infinity.
Elizabeth whiskers the tuxedo cat,
but Pablo stole the show-
If all the world’s a stage what did they build this stage for?
Tiny terrapin laughs at the pink moon.
Cortisol and hormones flood my mind, intoxicating blend of work
and age and busy brain, exploding in productivity-
5-7-5 right?
Was that enough syllables?
Fuck it, never mind.
Stick it in the fuck it bucket!
Ho you can court me in my pantoum.
My humps, my humps, my humpy humpy humps,
check it out.
I like flowers
they look cool.
Sick sleazy silk socks eat;
but the other way around.
I eat black holes for breakfast,
sausage a plenty,
discarded apple core,
a porridge-thick sickly sticking-
For the love of cider!
There’s always free cheddar in the mousetrap – Tom waits.
Satellite of Love
No trigger warnings for you
you only bring joy.

You know it’s bad when you consider turning to religion…

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